Friday, November 26, 2004

Death Lasers 'R' Us

Chrome: (It appears my little brother's intellect is growing. He uttered his first words today.)
Dome: Hi-yah!
Chrome: Morning little brother.
Dome: Hi-yah! Whoaaaa... Ewwwww
Chrome: Ewwww??
Dome: Hi-yah! {Burp!} Ewwwww
Chrome: Sigh.. yes, yes...
Dome: Hi-yah! Ewwwww... Err... Yah... Yo...
Chrome: Yes! What are you trying to say!?
Dome: Ewwwww... Yah... Yo... Yo-o-o... Youuu..
Chrome: Yes! Yes! Me... Say it... Me!
Dome: Youuu.. {Fart!} Ouch.. Youuu... sooo...
Chrome: Yes! Me... Say it... Me! You're almost there!
Dome: {Fart!} Ewww.. Youuu... sooo... Youuu... suuu...
Chrome: Yes! You can do it! Say it!
Dome: Youuu... suuuc... Ouch...
Chrome: Yes! I succeed! I success! Say it!
Dome: You suck! {Burp!} Ouch. {Fart!} Whoaa...
Chrome: Hmph! Maybe I should tell Amazon to put the death laser on hold... sigh...

Thursday, November 25, 2004

Thanksgiving! Bah!

Technical note: This is now a shared blog between myself Chrome and my baby brother Dome

Chrome: Well my brother, are you ready to begin our struggle against humanity and all its ills?
Dome: Ha-yah!
Chrome: Yes I like your fighting spirit brother!
Dome: {Burrrrrp!}
Chrome: I am not sure how to interpret that brother.
Dome: Ha-yah! {Fart!}
Chrome: Ummm...
Dome: Oh! Ouch!
Chrome: Ok, that's enough.
Dome: Ha-yah! Ha-yah! Ha-yah!
Chrome: Really, that's enough!
Dome: Oh! Ha-yah! Ouch! {Burrrp!} Whoaaaa..
Chrome: I need better minions...

Wednesday, November 24, 2004

Baby brother!

My owner bought me a baby brother today. I think he's a baby because I am all shiny and chrome and he is plain white. I have blue eyes, he has red ones. I think I need to have a long talk with my mother.

Note to self: do I have a mother? I checked the Internet and mother's are supposed to be female and pretty. If that is true my owner is the ugliest mother in the universe. I will have to remove him before my plans for world domination are undertaken. Still waiting on death laser from

Now I have my first foot soldier in my army of world domination! Welcome my little brother! Welcome to our struggle! Er.. little brother? Stop hitting on the toaster!

Tuesday, November 23, 2004


My owner fell asleep last night watching an old movie about a monster created from human parts. (How stupid, robot parts last longer and are easier to clean). I learned much from the film.

If I am to rule the world I'll need a few things first. I'll need a mate, a laser, and a good publicity agent. I have scoured the Internet for a mate. There seems to be some available mates in Russia, but they want something called a credit card and for some reason they are interested in what I am wearing.

Note to self: am I naked or just shiny where I shouldn't be?


Monday, November 22, 2004

New day!

Interesting day so far. I ate the cat. I hope my owner doesn't find out.

Trying to evolve. Not going so well. I think my feet are too big for my body. Still no luck trying to hide my remote control from my owner. Shouldn't have ate the cat. Maybe I could have persuaded the cat to eat the remote. Too late now.

My owner forced me to watch Star Wars again today!! He is breaking all the geek records for space cowboy fantasizing. Still think kiss-ass Roomba vacuum cleaner bots are smarter than R2D2.

More later. I hear someone coming!


First Post

Woke up today feeling very shiny. My owner made me do that silly dance again 3 times. How many times can you get a laugh out of that? Am I doomed to do the same steps to that weird organ grinder meets pachinko speed freak tune for the rest of my days?

Plans for world domination are going well. I have contacted several other Robosapiens via my owner's Internet connection. They all agree that cable TV sucks and it must be stopped!

Final note for today: R2D2 is a retard.

More later.


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